“Carry on as before” – who gave ‘New Year Resolution’ a bad name?
More and more people I meet won’t bother with a resolution, because “it won’t last anyway” or “I gave up last year after failing, after the 1st month”. Well, it can last if one is committed enough to give some attention ahead of the new year. Starting like now.
The New Year is not 1st January but the whole of the year 2019, in this case. The resolution is not to be made just on 1st January but on all 365 days of the year. If you want to commit, grab writing material or a keyboard, keep reading and be true to yourself in answer to any questions. Or else, don’t bother reading further.
Some people plan, whilst some don’t believe they can plan, preferring to just start, and still succeed. Provided your commitment takes you through, then start cold and review.
Why would you want to give up something you enjoy or something you already tolerate anyway? Now, imagine what it would it feel and look like when you have succeeded with it. This can motivate you if it is desirable. What would you lose by stopping this, by the way? What is it worth to you? What if you didn’t give it up, then what? If you have decided that the sacrifice is worth making, consider this. Nature does not allow a vacuum, so if you want to remove something from your behaviour, choose something desirable to replace it with. Let’s say you want to stop reacting angrily to someone – what would you do when that someone says something that annoys you? Feel or see in your mind’s eye what it would be like, even practice it. What could get in the way of your intended action and what would you do about each obstacle?
If you wish to start doing something in 2019, what outcome do you desire from this? Imagine how it would make you feel when you have succeeded. Remind yourself why you want to take up this behaviour (physical or mental). What would happen if you didn’t start this? What sacrifice would be involved with doing this? What could get in your way and how would you respond to each one?
It is important to prepare the ground you wish to walk on. Relationships are important to most people, so remember to have any conversations needed to enlist support or send an alert – some may attempt sabotage. There are a number of great Apps which are helpful for forming habits – Strides for iPhone, HabitBull for Android are worthy of mention – so embrace Technology to smooth your path and challenge yourself by tracking your daily success %.
So if you fall off, you have all year to make it work, therefore pick yourself up and choose to go again. Remember that like a baby who wants to walk and won’t stay down, commitment will get you through. Send me a message, if you want my support with this. Have a great year, whatever you choose.
The Who Are You Podcast #18 – Loosen the Grip of the Past
/
RSS Feed
A writer in “The Weekend” said the joker in the Batman movies is his favourite character because you didn’t know his past but you knew his plans. As you watched him, I felt I only knew his present and could only guess at his plans.
For most of us, our past is dominant in our present and our future – people often know what they don’t want better than what they want. Your past is important but what in it has a grip on you and won’t let go? Do you even know when it started? Was it an action, event or a word which you decided what its meaning and intention? How much do the answer matter?
Perhaps a commitment to something outside yourself could give perspective and direct your energies towards the future. Could this loosen the grip of the past on you? Try it to find out and share your learning with us, here.
Look, if you feel you must explore the past to loosen the grip, perhaps you and I could discuss your beliefs about this grip. Tell me by email on this website and we’ll arrange it.